Recently, I have been working on my subconscious mind to make my dream come true. Sounds ridiculous but our subconscious mind is simply very powerful. It controls your conscious mind to make up any decisions and put in the right track, direction and keep you healthy. I discovered I have been a dilemma since the beginning of the year because I have not made myself to believe whatever I have chosen to do is the right choice. Slowly, I have taken up my dream course, typed out my resignation letter and called the tuition agency as a back up career for 2008. I want to make believe that what I am determined to do will not be a setback. Even if it does, at least I have tried to pursue something which many ppl would rather choose to stay in their comfort zone. I shall not care and will be a risk taker. Do you know a risk taker is someone who will succeed in their life? Making 1 million a year is possible for a person who dares to take risk than a person who worries about this and that.
At the same time, my decision seems to have affected some of my friends at work. They keep asking me if I am serious about it. My reply was 'YES' and they did not comment much about it. Telling them why I am not deterred by any other factors, they agreed with me. Evan said she was rather contented with her job and would not mind it to be brainless. I wondered if she would still feel the same if she is in my shoes. Maybe she will still be contented, it is me who is uncontented. My best pal was apparent to my disclosure of news to her. I did not know she was suppressing it so hard from me. I feel so helpless and sad. I did not keep my words to her. I did not put myself in her shoes to think of how she feels everyday. I forgot she is good at hiding her emotions. I just thought she was busy tat day. I hate sch for causing all these false feelings that had developed on us. I still love her the most. She is incomparable to all my frens and besties.
There is a saying from all the ppl who had fallen in love. Never stay too close to your love ones. You will not want to be separated from them, not even for a short period of time. It is incredibly true. Perhaps man is born selfish no matter how you convince yourself that you are not and will not be. It is just a nature. However, it also depends on the other party's contribution. Are you doing what you think you have assumed you have put in a lot of effort to make him/her happy? Are you able to prove you are really trying hard to change for the better bcos of that someone? Is it worth to sacrifice for him/her? Have you really planned and thought about what is to be done and not to be done?
Haiz....dunno what i am trying to convey. Too lost in words after a hearty smses with my ecstasy.